Never have I cried for a guy so hard. So hard my head is pounding from the pain even the next day. Waking up the next morning, knowing he isn't mine. knowing he won't call me everyday anymore. Knowing I won't always be with him anymore. Knowing that if I ever do get to hang out with him again, he won't hold me, or my hand, and he won't kiss me. I can't be friends with you. It's better if i give up now then to wait foolishly...

One goodbye is another hello
One heartbreak is another love
One death is another birth
One end is another beginning
One almost is another forever
Never stop just because one thing ended.

Choke on... almost lover

"Above all, she loved being loved, and he flooded her with attentions. Making her feel so often that she existed for him, he made her existence real."

Albert Camus, Exile and the Kingdom 

Your fingertips across my skin
The palm trees swaying in the wind
Images

You sang me Spanish lullabies
The sweetest sadness in your eyes
Clever trick

I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
I should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

We walked along a crowded street
You took my hand and danced with me
Images

And when you left you kissed my lips
You told me you'd never ever forget these images, no

I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me

Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you
Can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
My back is turned on you
I should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do

I cannot go to the ocean
I cannot drive the streets at night
I cannot wake up in the morning
Without you on my mind
So you're gone and I'm haunted
And I bet you are just fine
Did I make it that easy
To walk right in and out of my life?

Choke on... nothing

Choke on... lost friendships

Here's a poem i'd like to share to someone.
I loved you like a sister, you were my angel.

Losing A Piece Of My Soul
by Jasmine Johnston

“ I came to you the hour I was in pain
    Looking for answers, I cried to you in vain.

I shared the many skeletons hiding in my heart,
I knew then you'd be my friend,
I knew it from the start.

Troubles ran like rivers, flowing through my life,
You picked the pieces up and help me through my strife.

When home wasn't home to me no more,
You opened up your heart, and opened up the door.

We cried into night until the early morn.
We solaced each other's pain and shared our many thorns.

As time flew, the air grew thick,
I saw our friendship fading, and my heart grew sick.

The day had arrived,
When it was time to say goodbye.

Now I sit alone,
reminiscing the past I'd blown.”


Can we be close again? Nevermind, i'll be leaving soon anyways.

Choke on...

"I’ve always wondered where that strength comes from. That dignity and grace that you’ve put on in the face of everything that has happened in your life, because I really wanna be that kind of person someday."

- One Tree Hill

"The best way is not to fight it, just go. Don’t be trying all the time to fix things. What you run from only stays with you longer. When you fight something, you only make it stronger."

Choke on... LoveHate

I fucking love him.

“ I don’t owe people anything, and I don’t have to talk to them any more than I feel I need to.

Ned Vizzini, It’s Kind of a Funny Story

 “You can’t be worried about what everyone’s going to think if it’s really coming from your soul. 
— PAUL BANKS 

Choke on...

“I’m always torn between wanting to tell my story to everyone to let them know exactly what is in my head and keeping it to myself. The problem is being unhappy and consistently so pushes people away, no matter if they say they’re always there to listen there is only so much even your best friends can listen too. On the otherhand, to pretend everything is fine is to poison yourself from the inside out; it is to ignore who you are and lose yourself. So which is better – to have friends that think you are melodramatic, attention seeking and pessimistic or to drown in your own mind?”

(via eletheowl)

Choke on... a-l-o-n-e

“Sometimes you just need to be alone. Sometimes, not even your best friend needs to know. Sometimes, you need to put up the walls so you can examine yourself in the peace and quiet. Sometimes the loud sounds need to fade away, leaving only the silence and you; that’s it.”

(via eletheowl)

Choke on... sleepyhead

This is how i look like right now, studying for my test in 8hrs.